Felt like I wanted to vent a bit on something that had been bothering me quite a while.
Much as I've admitted to being carefree in the past the truth is I can be needlessly aggressive at times and in many cases I've pretty much been the bad guy. Which has lead to me causing nasty fall outs, bad confrontations with people as well as just dirty laundry in general.
I'm very vocal in my views and I still hold to my ideals but many times in the past I've been unwilling to compromise with people and in turn been pretty shitty through it and just slammed the door in peoples faces which is bad form.
I'm also not going to just blame myself for everything that's ever gone wrong ever, other people have been shitty in the past too but I've ran around with a lot of unwarranted self righteousness and even said some things that where in bad taste.
Like with most self righteousness, whenever something happens it's always “The other parties fault, I never did anything wrong ever, it's all that person!” Even at times you go looking for confirmation bias and just building a bubble around yourself.
Even then there are times I've been a bit abusive to some friends and old RP buddies over Ims and taking aggression out on other people is really damn shitty and yeah while I do have depression and take episodes/mood swings that is still no excuse for acting in such poor standing with people.
So why write this up? Well mainly that I do want to become a better person and stop repeating the same damn mistakes but there is a difference between saying you will and doing it and I've said I would for a long time now but at this point I have to take some perspective. Not saying I'm a bad person or anything but I'm not the standard of my own ideals either.
I'm not out to mend any fences but rather learn from the past so I don't need to break the fence in the future.